Headway

Man, I am about over summer and this heat. I'm tired of not being able to do much more than just throw the ball a little for the dogs. My work hours keep me from being here during the 2 cooler hours in the morning and the evening- if it's even cooler then! Some mornings I walk out to my truck at 3:15am and it's as hot as it was at 6pm!! Just crazy!! I was approached by one of the assistant managers at work about a new position opening up. It's a new position for the store. I don't want to think I'll get it, but it would be nice. It's full time and a better shift for me. It's overnight, which is 10-7am. Working that shift I will be here for homework, dinner, and the couple hours we have with the kids in the evening once school starts. I will also be able to do a few things in the morning without first having to wait for it to be light outside. I can stay up until about 10am and sleep until 4pm. Six, solid and regular hours of sleep is enough for me. The new position is also a little more of a "career builder" kind of position. Basically it's inventory control for all the outside vendors that come in. So we'll see. I'm hopeful, but not expecting anything. I only told one person at work about it- a manager friend. He said if she came to me, then it's because she wants me for the job. But that's only his opinion....

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I was finally "brave" enough last night to have a talk with Ben about my frustrations with some things around the house and in our relationship. It went about like I figured, but ended well (at 1:15 in the morning) and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted. Ben told me to buy a dry erase board so we can list all our debts and have a visual plan on getting it paid off. Ben and I together make a heck of a lot of money- but our credit debt is just insane! We are no longer on that path- but of course we are still paying.... He promises me we'll get the drywall mudding done over the weekend. I don't think he had a clue how much living in a construction zone was driving me crazy. Actually I don't mind the construction, it's when it comes to a screeching (long term) halt that I become aggravated. I explained that I was so over always being embarrassed with how my house looked, and that I was no longer going to live like that and if I had to spend my paycheck on hiring out the job, I would!! Of course he was defensive and pissed- but we worked thru it. My next big decision is whether or not I need to sell a few of my dogs. It's a huge decision and one that is heavy on my heart. Not something I am going to decide quickly or on impulse. If I did sell a few it would be a business choice, not a personal one. I can care for and keep up with the number I have. I can't afford to trial all the ones ready to trial, surely, but that's not a big deal. Getting our crazy debt paid off is a serious issue and HAS to be the priority RIGHT NOW. The question I have to answer myself is whether or not selling a few of my dogs is worth the dent their price would put in the debt... I also need to remember what I enjoy doing. I 100% enjoy raising pups and getting a dog to the PN/Ranch level of work. But I surely cannot keep everything I train to that level. Of course I have some dogs here that will never go anywhere- never. But I also have some that I would be comfortable selling to the right home. I suppose I have personal dogs and "business" dogs. Anyone who trains animals for a living will understand what I mean. People that only have their personal dogs/animals will not. So anyway, as of today at least I feel like we're making some headway on getting things in our life a little more under control! Ben has thousands of dollars of comic hero statues and such that he is willing to part with. Like me and my dogs, he has some he will not part with, but has lots and lots that he will. He is a serious comic book and figure collector, but recognizes the seriousness of our situation and is willing to do what needs to be done to fix it. If we can just rid of our credit card debt we will be able to buy and do just about anything we'd want- in cash! What a foolish thing- credit cards! You can bet our children will NOT make the mistakes we did!!